时间:2017年10月20日 15:03:32

He#39;s cute, fun, smart and you can#39;t stop thinking about him. Not so fast. While many men may seem ideal after just a few weeks of dating, upon closer inspection, there can be warning signs that you should avoid a relationship with this person. It is important to recognize these warning signs before it#39;s too late.他长得帅,又很有趣,而且聪明,你都没法停下来不去想他。别太快陷进去。有些男人在约会几周后看上去似乎就是理想的另一半,但再仔细观察一下,有些警示信息就会出现了,告诉你这样的男人要不得。尽快发现这些警示很重要,以免后悔莫及。1. The set-in-his-ways guy.只按自己方式做事的男人These men will only become more rigid over time. Dating someone who refuses to do anything new makes for a long-term relationship that is both boring and one-sided. Assuming that he will eventually change and open up to your hobbies is misguided. This will likely never happen.随着年龄的增长,这样的男人只会越来越固执。如果你的约会对象不愿意做些新的事情来维持你们的关系,不让你们的关系变得单调又一边倒的话,假设这样的男人会改变,并且会迎合你的兴趣,那你就太天真了。这种事是绝对不会发生的。2. The pick-up-after-me guy.需要你来料理生活的男人You are his partner, not his maid. Men who expect you to clean up their dishes, pick up their clothes and take care of them as if they are little children on a consistent basis need a really check, and will likely treat you as if you are their mother for the rest of their lives.你是他的另一半,而不是他的女佣。这种男人会指着你来刷盘子、洗衣、照顾他的饮食起居,把自己当成是需要人经常照顾的小孩,而把你当成是他的老妈子。3. The I-don#39;t-know-what-I#39;m-looking-for guy.“我不知道我要什么”的男人One day, he wants a relationship. The next day, he wants kids. Two months later, he#39;s not sure about either. Often times when this line is pulled, its code for ;I#39;m looking for a marriage and kids, just not with you.; Steer clear.今天他想要谈恋爱,明天他想要有孩子,两个月后,他又什么都不确定了。经常出现从这种男人嘴里说出的台词是“我想要结婚,也想要有孩子,不过不是和你。”想想清楚吧,子们。4. The I-need-to-watch-sports-all-the-time guy.“我只想一直看比赛”的男人There#39;s nothing wrong with sitting on the couch and watching sports. Many guys do. But this should never trump the responsibilities of a relationship or take precedence over family obligations. There is a difference between loving sports and having a childish obsession with them. Choose a man who knows the difference.蜷坐在沙发上,看看体育比赛,这没什么不好的,很多男人都会这么做。但是决不能因此而逃避家庭中的责任和义务。热爱体育和孩子气的沉迷比赛是有很大不同的。你要找的男人必须要会分辨其中的差别。5. The I-don#39;t-like-your-friends guy.“我不喜欢你的朋友”的男人No man is more important than your friends. If he doesn#39;t like them and refuses to hang out with them, leave immediately.没有一个男人会比你的朋友更重要。如果他不喜欢你的朋友,不愿意和他们一起出去,那就赶紧离开这个男人。6. The I-get-increasingly-less-romantic-with-each-date guy.“我对约会厌倦了”的男人Many men break out all the stops early on in the dating process, but by the fifth of sixth date, the laziness starts to creep in. While no man should always be expected to plan five-star dates, at the same time, the romance shouldn#39;t just completely fall off a cliff at once. These changes in effort can be very foretelling of how he will be a year or two down the road.在刚开始约会的时候,很多男人都会大献殷勤,但是约会五六次之后,有些男人就懒得翻花样了。当然不能指望男人每次都能策划五星级的约会,但同时要知道浪漫约会不能在达到顶峰后立马结束。这种心思的变化可以预示出一个男人在一两年后是个什么样子。7. The let#39;s-just-stay-in guy.只想在室内待着的男人If you like being indoors more than being outdoors, this may be a good match for you. But men who are constantly suggesting that they want to just stay in and watch a movie early on in the dating game are likely the lazy type, or only out for sex. This will only get worse over time.如果你也是个宅女,那么这样的男人也许适合你。但是男人在约会初期就总是建议待在屋里看电影,那么这个人可能很懒或者只是想和你上床。这种情况会随着时间的推移越来越坏。8. The lack-of-ambition guy.没有抱负的男人Be very wary of men who talk up a big game of what they plan on doing with their lives. Some men with no ambition whatsoever like to talk up a good game, but at the end of the day, they are just saying what they know women want to hear. There is nothing wrong with a guy who wants to grow into a better person, just make sure that he#39;s genuine.对于男人说的关于未来的大计划,要非常谨慎小心。有些没有抱负的男人反而喜欢说些大话,到最后,他们也只是挑女人喜欢听的说罢了。男人如果想要变得更好,那是极好的,但要先确保他是真心的。9. The ;sorry, I#39;m not a big phone person, ; guy.“我不爱打电话”的男人Some men may not like being tied down to a phone, but responding to your text messages or phone calls shouldn#39;t be annoying; it#39;s common courtesy and respect. This is a warning sign of future selfish behavior.有些男人也许的确不爱守着电话,但是回复你的短信或来电却并应该是一件烦人的事,这是一种基本的礼仪和尊重。如果他不爱打电话的话,也许是日后自私的征兆。10. The over-controlling guy.控制欲过强的男人The opposite of number nine, the over-controlling guy must know where ;his woman; his every second of the day and approve of who she is hanging out with. Run from this type of man immediately.与第九条相反,这种男人控制欲过强,他们想要知道“他的女人”每时每刻的动静,要得到他的允许,他的女人才能和别人出去。遇到这种男人还是趁早抽身吧。 /201311/262968

A Chinese man has ensured that his movie night on Friday will not be ruined by snuggling couples, after he bought every other seat at a cinema in Shanghai.一名中国男子在情人节当天一下子买光了上海一家电影院放映厅的所有隔座,这也保了他观影时不被你侬我侬的情侣干扰。The unnamed man’s anti-Valentine’s triumph was made possible after he set up a campaign on a crowdfunding site in order to be able to afford all the tickets.这位匿名男子成功地进行了一场“反情人节运动”。此前该男子曾在网上发起活动,来募集资金购买所有的单座票。Thanks to his campaign, a Valentine’s Day showing of the film Beijing Love Story at a movie theatre in the city’s Xintiandi shopping centre now only offers odd seats.由于这位男子发起的活动,情人节当日在上海新天地一家影院中,电影《北京爱情故事》场次只出售单座票。The man, only identifying himself by the online nickname UP, described himself to the Shanghai Morning Post as a ‘computer nerd’.这位男子网名为“UP”,他向《新闻晨报》透露自己是一名“电脑迷”。After breaking up with his girlfriend last year, he is no longer interested in finding himself stuck between loved-up couples on Friday.去年“UP”与女友分手,他表示没兴趣在周五情人节挤在甜蜜的情侣之间。UP explained to the newspaper that the stunt was difficult to pull off as the theatres online bookings system refused him to reserve odd seats, and the staff at the cinema refused his request.“UP”对《新闻晨报》说,买光单座的方法很难实施,在线订票系统不允许他只订单座票,影院方面也拒绝了他的请求。‘I also didn#39;t have enough money. So finally a friend recommended that I start a campaign on a crowdfunding site, and there were enough single internet friends out there to help me raise the money to do this sort of thing.#39;“我也没这么多钱,所以最后我朋友建议我去集资网站上发起一个活动,那里应该有很多感兴趣的单身网友,也许会帮我募集资金来完成这个活动。”#39;I hope all lovers understand this is just a small joke,#39; he added.他还说:“我希望情侣们能理解,这只是我们单身族的一个小小的恶作剧。”After the online campaign, UP and his group of defiant singles have bought every other seat in the cinema, so that no two adjacent seats are available to purchase.在线上募集好资金后,“UP”和一群“反情人节”的单身族在一家影院里买光了所有的单号座,这样就没有连在一起的座位供情侣们购买了。 /201402/276275

Who should pay for the first date? The majority says it’s the guy’s responsibility. A survey released this month found that about 77 percent of people in heterosexual relationships believe men should settle the bill on the first date. The survey was put together by US financial website NerdWallet. The site polled roughly 1,000 Americans who had been dating their partners for six months or more.第一次约会该由谁买单?多数人认为这是男士的责任。本月初,美国财经网站NerdWallet公布了一项针对近1000名交往6个月及以上情侣的调查结果。数据显示,77%(异性恋)受访者认为应该由男士来买单。The financial chivalry began when, in the past, women had no access to employment and therefore couldn’t fend themselves financially. But nowadays, more and more women have become the bwinners. According to The Atlantic, between 1960 and 2011 in the US, the proportion of two-parent US households in which the mother earned all or most of the income roughly quadrupled.过去,这种勇于付款的“骑士精神”是因为女性没有工作,不能经济独立。但现如今,越来越多的女性都成为养家糊口的主力军,据美国《大西洋月刊》报道,从1960年到2011年,美国双亲家庭中母亲是家中主要或全部经济来源的家庭所占比例几乎翻了两番。So why, amid economic changes and gender equity advancements, are men still expected to pay for the bill?那么,在经济变革、两性更加平等的今天,为什么依旧应该由男士来买单呢?“As social roles start to change, people often embrace the changes that make their lives easier, but resist the changes that make their lives more difficult,” David Frederick, a professor of psychology at Chapman University, US, told The Huffington Post. “Who pays for dates … is one arena where women may be resisting gender changes more than men,” he suggested.美国柴普曼大学心理学教授大卫#8226;弗里德瑞克在接受《赫芬顿邮报》采访时表示,“在社会角色开始发生变化时,人们往往愿意接受那些使生活更容易的变化,排斥令生活更麻烦的变化。而谁来买单的问题?(在这个问题上)女性比男性更抗拒性别角色的变化。”Men pay more男士付得多Frederick is a co-author of a study released last year that also found men tend to pay for dates. The study was larger than NerdWallet’s and polled about 17,000 people, according to The Atlantic. The study also found 39 percent of its female respondents admitted that they hoped men would reject their offers to help pay. Frederick and his colleagues called paying for dates “a rare case” in which women are motivated not to fight old-school gender dynamics. In the same way, men who are no longer bwinners aren’t as eager to take up domestic responsibilities such as parenting and homemaking.弗里德瑞克教授去年与别人共同进行的一项研究发现,男士依旧是约会买单的主力。《大西洋月刊》报道称,这项调查的规模比NerdWallet网站的还大,约17000人参与了调查。数据显示,39%女性受访者承认就算自己提出买单要求,内心仍希望男士抢着付钱。弗里德瑞克教授和他的同事们认为,这是女性不抵触传统性别角色的“特例”。与之类似的还有,男士虽然不再独挑养家糊口的重担,却仍不愿承担教育小孩、操持家务等家庭责任。Many people would argue men’s paying for dates is a form of respecting women. But Joe Pinsker, writing in The Atlantic, says this seemingly “benevolent” form of sexism can lead to a sense of entitlement on men’s part — they tend to think that women owe them because they have paid.不少人认为男士在约会时买单是一种对女性的尊重。但乔#8226;皮斯科在美国《大西洋月刊》上撰文称,这种看似“善意”的大男子主义会让男人感觉自己拥有更多权利——他们为约会买单,因此认为女性对他们有所亏欠。Money can twist men’s opinion of sexual consent. Pinsker cites a 2010 study published in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence. It found that men were more likely than women to think that sex should be expected when a man pays for an expensive date.此外,付钱还会让男性将其误解为允许发生性关系的许可。皮斯科还援引了一份2010年发表于《人际暴力杂志》的调查,其结果显示,在为昂贵的约会买单后,男性比女性更容易认为将与对方发生关系。This really is disturbing. But Frederick found something optimistic in his study that might serve as a warning to some women. Almost half of the men surveyed in the study he co-authored said that they would break up with a woman if she never offered to help pay the bill on a date. “In this single telling finding about dating and paying interactions, we see evidence of a sea change,” Frederick wrote.这确实让人感到不安,但弗里德瑞克教授在他的研究中也发现了一些好消息,供一些女士参考:调查中,几乎一半男性都表示如果约会对象从未有过要买单的意思,他们会选择分手。弗里德瑞克教授说,“从这一结果可以看出,在约会与买单的互动关系上,我们可以看到巨大的不同。” /201410/335410

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